The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Jordan be snoopin' on the judge's lass in the Trump hullabaloo, spyin' on her ties to Kamala and her crew!

2024-08-01

Ahoy, mateys! Captain Jim Jordan be snoopin’ ‘round the judge’s lass who ruled over Trump’s trial, spyin’ on her past parley with Vice President Kamala Harris. Aye, the winds of scandal be blowin’! Fox News be spillin’ the beans on this merry mischief! Arrr!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of political shenanigans! Captain Jim Jordan, the bold Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee, be investigatin' the daughter of the judge who put the former President Trump in the brig for his nefarious doin's. This lass, Loren Merchan, be tangled in the web of political mischief for her work with Vice President Kamala Harris, arrr!

In a letter that be more than a parchment of complaints, Captain Jordan be demandin' all sorts of scrolls from young Loren about her dealings with the Democrats. It seems her firm, Authentic Campaigns, be rakin' in gold coins while servin' the likes of President Biden and ol' Kamala. The Captain be claimin' there be a stench of conflict of interest, what with her pap's gavel hangin' over Trump's fate!

With much bluster, the Captain be yellin' for contracts and communications that might show how much treasure Authentic Campaigns be makin' off the trial o' the Donald! Aye, 'tis a quest for truth in these treacherous waters of political prosecution! So, mark yer calendars, for the deadline be August 8! Keep yer eyes peeled, for this be a saga not to be missed, ye scallywags!

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