Arrr, JD Vance be callin’ the press to hound Kamala, sayin’, "No more lovey-dovey, ye scallywags!"
2024-08-07
Arrr, on the fine day of Wednesday, JD Vance be givin' the scallywags of the press a right tongue-lashin’! He be callin’ for the fair Kamala to face the cannonballs of hard questions and cease their disgraceful parley! Blimey, what a merry hullabaloo!
Arrr mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout a scallywag named JD Vance, a Republican matey vying for the vice captaincy! In a grand spectacle in Detroit, he be callin' out the media for givin' Kamala Harris a right ol' honeymoon—why, it be a disgrace, I tell ye! Vance be demandin' the press to rattle her cage and make her answer for her past misdeeds, like a true captain ought to do!“Ye be givin' her a free pass!” he declared through a sea of reporters, suggestin' they show a wee bit o' self-awareness. “This lass has been hidin’ in the shadows, not takin' a single question since she claimed her spot on the Democratic ship!” Vance, with a twinkle in his eye, went on to jab at her handling of law enforcement and her border antics, likin' her silence to a cowardly pirate avoidin' a cannon fight!
“We be wantin’ to know who be leadin’ us!” he bellowed, remindin’ the media that the American crew deserves to hear from their would-be captain. So, he be askin' them to put on their pirate hats and bring the lady out into the light! Pirate or politician, it's time to stand before the crew and answer the hard questions, lest ye be walkin' the plank! Arrr, let the truth set sail!