The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Harris be sayin' Walz be spoutin' tall tales 'bout his sea-farin' days! Blimey, what a scallywag!

2024-08-11

Arrr, the Democratic matey runnin' for second-in-command be takin' fire from the Republican scallywags! They be claimin’ he spun a yarn ‘bout his sea battles, avoidin’ the cannonballs like a landlubber! A right jolly jest, I say! Avast, the seas be filled with tall tales!

Arrr, me hearties! Gather ye round for a tale of political squabblin’ on the high seas o’ democracy! The fine matey lookin’ to be second-in-command, a Democratic lad by the name of vice-presidential nominee, be catchin’ flak from the Republican crew. Aye, they be claimin’ he tallied his military deeds a wee bit too grandly, like a sailor boastin’ of catchin’ fish the size o’ a kraken!

As the winds of debate blow fierce, these scallywags be suggestin’ our fair nominee dodged more battles than a deckhand avoids the bilge. “Nay, matey!” they cry, “he sat on the sidelines while true swashbucklers faced off against the enemy!” But fear not, for our nominee be standin’ tall, ready to defend his honor faster than a cannonball flies from the galley!

So, grab yer tankards and raise a toast, for in this here political skirmish, we’ve got tales of valor and bravado, with a hint of comedic folly! Only time will tell if our brave nominee can navigate these treacherous waters or if he’ll end up walkin’ the plank of public opinion! Yo ho ho, let the political rumble commence!

Read the Original Article