The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Ahoy! Morning's bright, but Kamala ain't fit to hoist the Jolly Roger of presidency just yet!"

2024-08-13

Arrr, matey! The Harris campaign be naught but a tricksy fog, hidin’ her lack o’ readiness fer the toughest cap’n job on the seven seas! Aye, 'tis like tryin’ to sail a ship with no sails, laughable, I say! Avast, me hearties, watch the show unfold!

Arrr! Gather ‘round, me hearties, fer a tale o’ two political scallywags! On one side, we’ve the former captain, Trump, who sailed through the stormy seas o’ COVID, claimin’ treasures of economic growth whilst keepin’ inflation at bay. With a trusty crew o’ officials, he charts a course back to tax cuts, bolsterin’ defenses against foes, and a grand push fer energy like a pirate huntin’ for buried gold. Ahoy, he be a wild card, but we knows what he brings to the table!

Now, on the flip side, we have Vice President Harris, bless her soul. She’s as useful as a barnacle on a ship’s hull, lackin’ the essential tools to command a vessel of state. She’s got a shiny law degree, but can she steer the ship? Naught a single presidential primary has she won, and her track record be murky as the deep sea. Her time as Biden’s first mate has been naught but a series o’ misadventures, leavin’ us with more questions than answers.

So, should we trust this lass to navigate the turbulent waters of the presidency? If I had me pick from the political seas, I'd choose a clever shipwright or a savvy merchant over a district attorney any day! With her campaign of invisibility, the winds o’ change be blowin’, but beware, mateys, fer if this be our future, we might be in fer a stormy voyage ahead!

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