Arrr, matey! Mark yer calendars! Trump be walkin' the plank to prison come September 18, savvy? Aye!
2024-08-14
Arrr, matey! The New York scallywags be playin' politics, not seekin' justice, savvy? 'Tis why we dub it "lawfare," a fine jest indeed! The prosecutors and the judge be more like sea rats, care not if the guilty verdict be tossed overboard later! Ha!
Ahoy there, me hearties! It be no surprise that Judge Juan Merchan be stickin' to his guns, denyin' old Captain Trump’s plea for him to scuttle from the case! The scallywag has been found guilty of a whopping 34 counts of fiddlin’ with business records by the crafty District Attorney Alvin Bragg. Merchan’s set a date for sentencing on the eve of Septemb'r 18, right when early votes be castin' in Pennsylvania!Now, Trump’s crew be makin' a fuss o'er the U.S. Supreme Court’s ruling that former captains of state be shielded from the gallows for their official deeds. But alas, Merchan ain't budgin’! He be ready to send the former president to the brig, come what may!
Trump’s lawyers be hollerin’ about bias, claimin’ Merchan’s girl be too cozy with Vice President Kamala Harris. But Merchan, like a stubborn barnacle, stands firm, preparin' for sentencing, while the sails of Trump’s appeal be droopin'.
So gird yer loins, mates! The judge be ready to strike, and the media be lickin' their chops to brand Trump as a “convicted felon” just as the election winds be blowin’! Arrr, the seas be treacherous, and we be in for a bumpy ride ahead! Prepare for a stormy verdict and hold fast to yer rum!