Arrr, I be a swashbucklin' graduate o' Columbia! Off with the captain's head, that be a fine begin!
2024-08-17
Arrr, the scallywags at Columbia be forgettin’ that higher learnin’ be about seekin' the truth, not chasin’ after fancy fads! Now, they best haul anchor and show us they be puttin' the quest for knowledge above all else, or they'll be walkin' the plank!
Arrr matey! Columbia University has finally set sail without its scallywag of a captain, Minouche Shafik, who walked the plank amidst a storm of division and chaos! Blimey, it took 'em long enough! Shafik leaves behind a legacy of ruckus, and her departure be but a single wave in a vast sea of change needed at this fine institution.As a proud ol’ sailor who once roamed the halls during the raucous protests of '68, I can tell ye, chaos be a familiar foe! Back then, just like now, the ruckus-makers were left unchecked while the leaders dithered like barnacles on a ship’s hull. Shafik, bless her heart, catered to the wild crew instead of puttin’ 'em in their place, lettin’ the ship run aground with no compass in sight.
Now, with her gone, me hearties ponder: Will Columbia steer toward the winds of intellectual honesty and creativity? Or will it simply replace one captain with another who lets the mischief continue? Tread lightly, me mateys! Until real change washes ashore, I’d think twice before sendin’ young landlubbers to this institution of turmoil. Let’s hope they find a captain who knows the true treasure of education—truth! Arrr!