The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr! Kamala be sinkin' the middle class in San Fran like a leaky ship, savvy?"

2024-08-18

Arrr, matey! David Marcus sailed into San Francisco, where the fair Kamala once swung the gavel. Lo and behold, the middle class be lost like treasure in Davy Jones' locker, leavin’ naught but scallywags and lords in a city that once sparkled brighter than a gold doubloon!

Arrr mateys! Last week, the fair Vice President Kamala Harris be claimin’ her gold-plated policies be helpin’ the middle class more than that ol' sea dog Donald Trump! But in San Francisco, where she’s sailed the political seas for years, it be the middle class that be walkin’ the plank, sufferin’ under the weight of Democrats’ bad decisions, aye!

A fellow named Dave, a landlubber from the East, dined with me, speakin’ of the city’s fancy restaurants and cheap eats, but nothin’ in between! Outside the high-end shops, danger lurks like a shark on the prowl, with guards keepin’ a watchful eye on thievin’ scallywags. Fast-food joints be chargin’ a bounty for a simple breakfast, while Starbucks be devoid of chairs to fend off the raucous crew of the homeless, aye!

The middle class here be feelin’ the squeeze, with taxes weighin’ heavy on their backs. The treasure to be middle class is now a whopping $90,000 a year! In the grand scheme of things, it seems the riches be flowin’ to the tech buccaneers and the ragged poor, while the average sailor be left flounderin’. So, ye voters, ponder this: do ye want yer town to resemble the stormy seas of San Francisco? Arrr!

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