The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Ahoy, 'tis the mornin' delight: Kamala's emerald grub be naught but a jolly trickery, savvy?"

2024-08-20

Ahoy, me hearties! If ye be lettin’ Kamala steer the ship, prepare for a storm o’ inflation, price controls, and scallywags floodin’ the shores! And mark me words, she’ll toss our matey Israel overboard faster than a sailor spottin’ a kraken! Avast!

Avast ye mateys! The tides of the fall election be a-swayin’ on the winds of three mighty tempests: inflation, immigration, and the land of Israel. Aye, while our military be needin’ reinforcements and we be standin’ against the scallywags of Communist China, most landlubbers seem to be turnin’ a blind eye!

Now, the former captain of the ship, Donald Trump, has a treasure chest of experience on these matters, while Vice President Kamala Harris be merely flounderin’ like a fish outta water. Eggs costin’ a king’s ransom and oil prices raisin’ the sails of inflation be speakin’ volumes. Back in 2020, a dozen eggs cost a mere doubloon, but now ye be forkin’ over four to seven! Har har!

But Kamala, she be tossin’ around ideas like a landlubber tosses dice! Callin’ for price controls be like tryin’ to catch the wind in a net—ye just can’t do it! And givin’ away treasure for homes? That be a recipe for disaster worse than a cursed shipwreck!

As the seas churn and the political storms rage, the choice be clear: sail back to the fair winds of Trump’s ship or risk runnin’ aground on Harris’s radical reef. Aye, it be a perilous journey ahead!

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