The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Avast! Jester takes a tumble on the rope, but fear not, matey—he be doin' just fine!"

2024-08-20

Arrr, matey! A lass on a wobbly rope took a tumble, caught on the eye o’ a landlubber from Sussex! The circus be claimin' she’s now as fine as a mermaid in a moonlit cove! Aye, what a jolly spectacle!

Avast ye hearties! Gather 'round and lend me yer ears, fer I bring tidings from the wild world of the circus! A fair lass, a tightrope performer of the High Wire Troupe, took a most unexpected dive from her lofty perch during a raucous show at Gravity Circus in Hastings, East Sussex. Aye, she went flyin' like a startled parrot, though the exact distance of her descent be still a mystery, savin' fer the brave souls who witnessed the spectacle!

One audience member, brave enough to share her tale, claimed that the lass's leg betrayed her, sendin' her hurlin’ down, tangled up in the very wire that once held her aloft! She made quite the ruckus upon impact, crashing down onto the metal floor beneath like a cannonball from a ship's deck! Fear not, fer the circus declared she be in "safe hands" as she was whisked away to the Royal Sussex County Hospital, sufferin’ only some facial and other injuries, none life-threatenin', thank the sea gods!

Though her name remains a secret, the show must go on, as the circus folk assure us that performances shall continue as scheduled. So hoist the sails and keep yer spirits high—this tale be but a part of the grand adventure of the circus life! Arrr!

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