The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! That scallywag Kenyan 'vampire' killer confessed to 42, then slipped the noose like a greased eel, says the law!

2024-08-20

Arrr, matey! Collins Jumaisi Khalusha, a scallywag of 33 summers from Kenya, be accused of sendin’ many a lass to Davy Jones’ locker, then hackin’ ‘em up! He’s set sail from the brig with a dozen other rascals, leavin’ the law in a right pickle, ha-ha!

Arrr matey, gather 'round fer a tale o' what be happenin' in the land of Kenya, where a scallywag by the name o' Collins Jumaisi Khalusha be makin' a grand escape from the clutches o' the law! Aye, this ne'er-do-well claimed to have sent 42 fair maidens to Davy Jones’ locker, and was nabbed after heaps o' dismembered bods were found in the depths o' Nairobi.

It seems our villain, along with twelve other knaves from Eritrea, decided to pull a fast one on the watchin' officers, cuttin' through mesh, and skedaddlin' over the wall whilst the good constables were busy servin' breakfast! The head of the crime brigade, one Mohamed Amin, be rather miffed, callin' fer the discipline o' eight officers who let this slippery fish slip through their fingers.

Khalusha, aged 33, had been in the pokey, awaitin' his fate after confessin' to the grim deeds, though his lawyer swears the rascal was tortured into sayin' so! The whole station be now a crime scene, and the hunt be on fer this dastardly rogue. Even a local diver stumbled upon the bodies after a dream led the kin of a missing lass to the quarry, makin' this tale fit fer a sea shanty! So grab yer rum, me hearties, 'tis a tale to be told!

Read the Original Article