Arrr! Biden’s givin’ the ol’ nuke game a swashbucklin’ makeover to fend off them scallywags from the East!
2024-08-21
Arrr, me hearties! The White House be claimin’ no shifts in the U.S. nuke game, not a single cannonball aimed at any scallywag, even while China be hoardin' warheads like treasure! Aye, 'tis a fine tale of denial, mateys!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round, fer I be spinnin' a yarn 'bout the goin's-on in the realm of mighty nations! Word be out that President Biden, in the hush of March, gave the ol' nod to change the U.S. nuclear posture, eyeing them scallywags from Russia and China. But lo and behold, the White House be claimin’ this be just par for the course, like a pirate’s rum ration! Arrr!When the New York Times be blowin’ the whistle, a spokesperson from the White House said, “Nay, this here guidance ain’t aimed at any single knave or threat!” They be likin’ to keep things classified, like a treasure map, but declared it all be above board. The Pentagon be singin’ a different tune, sayin’ China be stockpilin’ nuclear warheads like a hoarder with gold doubloons, expected to triple by 2035. Aye, but Russia and the U.S. still hold a bounty of nuclear weapons—over eleven times that of China!
In response to inquiries, savvy Sean Savett claimed, “We be reviewin' our policies like a seasoned captain keeps an eye on the horizon!” Even as China raised its spyglass in concern, sayin’ they be no part of any arms race, the seas of geopolitics be choppy, me hearties! So raise a mug to the ever-changin’ tides of international diplomacy, where the stakes be higher than a ship's mast!