The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr! Five taxes from that scallywag Kamala could sink the middle class ship, matey! Hoist the sails of irony!"

2024-08-26

Arrr, matey! The winds o' time be fickle, but they do whisper o' what lies ahead! In the case o' Kamala Harris, her history in California be a treasure chest o' taxes that might soon be plunderin' yer booty! Keep a weather eye open, ye scallywags!

Arrr, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn about Vice President Kamala Harris and her grand scheme fer the landlubbers! On the sixteenth day o' August, she be blabberin' about banishin' price gougin' from the grocery holds, cancellin' medical debts (what be next, pirates' treasure?), and tossin’ a hefty child tax credit o' $6,000 per wee scallywag for their first year! Aye, and a bounty o’ $25,000 fer landlubbers lookin' to buy their first ship—I mean, home!

But shiver me timbers! If ye be dwellin' in San Francisco, where the treasure chests hold a median home price o' $1,300,000, ye won't even gather a mere 2% fer the down payment! 'Tis like givin' a parrot a gold doubloon and expectin' it to buy ye a ship!

As fer how to fund these grand ideas, Harris be thinkin' of uppin’ the corporate taxes, takin' a cut of the treasure from the rich merchants. With taxes on sugary drinks and a monstrous sales tax, it seems the middle class be walkin' the plank straight into poverty! The good ship America be in fer a wild ride if ye be followin' the San Francisco ways!

So, prepare yerselves, me mateys! If ye vote fer this crew, it may lead to a future where we’re all taxed to the depths o' Davy Jones' locker! Yarrr!

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