The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Harris and Trump be squawkin' like seagulls 'bout who gets the shiny talkin' stick in the ABC hullabaloo!

2024-08-26

Arrr, the old captain of the ship be mockin' the scallywag network, wonderin' why he'd join the fray. Meanwhile, the first mate be demandin' that all yer voices be blarin' like a cannon for the whole Sept. 10 shindig! A right ruckus, it be!

Arrr, me hearties! Gather ye round fer a tale o’ political shenanigans on the high seas o’ debate! The former captain o’ the ship, known as the president, be scoffin’ at the blasted network, wonderin’ why in Davy Jones’ locker he’d even bother to join their ruckus. Aye, he be spoutin’ words like cannon fire, makin’ it clear he be no fan o’ their treacherous waters.

Meanwhile, the trusty first mate, the vice president, be callin’ all hands on deck to keep the candidates’ microphones blarin’ like a ship’s horn the whole time o’ the grand event on the 10th o’ September. “Let ‘em speak!” he be proclaiming, as if to say, “Let the seas roar with their blabber!” It be a curious sight, watchin’ these landlubbers bicker like scallywags in a tavern brawl.

So there ye have it, mateys! A raucous clash o’ egos on the horizon, with one captain takin’ the wind outta the network’s sails and the other shoutin’ for endless chatter like a parrot on the shoulder! Aye, what a jolly spectacle it be, as we await the next round o’ banter on this treacherous sea o’ politics!

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