The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Avast, matey! Kamala's tax storm be sinkin' yer doubloons and the whole ship o' the US treasure!

2024-08-29

Arrr, matey! Vice President Kamala be plannin’ to hoist a $5 trillion tax tide, the grandest ever seen on these shores! If she gets her way, the whole American treasure map be gettin’ a right good shake-up, savvy? Prepare yer doubloons, ye landlubbers!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of treachery from yon seas of politics! Governor Tim Walz be sayin’ that a Harris crew would be keepin' out of our most private quarters, but by Davy Jones' locker, they be settin' sail fer our gold doubloons instead!

Ye see, the crafty Harris be plottin' a $5 trillion tax increase, the likes of which we’ve ne’er seen! She be lookin’ to raise the corporate tax rate, makin’ our fine ships of commerce less seaworthy against foreign foes. Aye, this be meanin' higher prices fer the common folk and less booty for the hardworking crew!

And hold yer hats, fer she plans to raise the capital gains tax, takin' a bigger slice of the treasure when ye sell yer ship! Not to mention, she’s got her sights on families, plannin’ to tax yer inheritance as if ye be payin’ the ferryman to cross the river Styx!

But fear not, ye salty sea dogs! This be a call to arms fer all ye political independents! Join forces with the conservatives to fend off this tax tsunami that threatens to drown us in red ink! Yarrr, together we shall defend our plunder and keep our treasures safe from the likes of her grand schemes!

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