Arrr! VP Harris be claimin' her values be steady, but the winds be blowin' her compass askew! Still a scallywag!
2024-08-30
Arrr, in her maiden chat without a script, Vice President Kamala Harris be sayin’ her "values be as steady as a ship in a calm sea," though her policies be shiftin’ like a treasure map in a storm! Aye, those winds o’ change be blowin' fierce!
Arrr, gather ye scallywags, for the tale of Vice President Kamala Harris be a jolly one! The lass faced a storm of mockery on the high seas of the internet after claimin’ her “values have not changed,” despite her many policy flip-flops. In her debut interview as a presidential candidate, she stood with her matey, Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz, and when asked about her changing stances, she spouted words that made the crew chuckle like a barrel of rum.“Me values be steady as the North Star!” she declared, yet the salty sea dogs noted that her actions be sayin’ otherwise. Critics from across the land claimed she be tryin’ to act all moderate to win the election, as if she were a zebra paintin’ over her stripes. “Aye,” said one observer, “when she says her values haven’t changed, she’s just chasin' after the wind!”
Even the interviewer, Dana Bash, tossed her softballs like a fine deckhand, but still, the winds of confusion blew fiercely. As Harris talked ‘bout climate and border security, many a landlubber pointed out her past rambunctious claims about banning fracking and the infamous wall she once derided. Alas, it seems the seas of politics be ever-changing, but for Kamala, the compass be stuck on “radical!” Arrr, it be a fine show indeed!