The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

GREG GUTFELD: What’s so wild ‘bout a cap’n havin’ sharp scallywags in his crew, eh? Blimey, savvy?

2024-08-29

Arrr matey! The scallywags on 'Gutfeld!' be chortlin' at the thought of a Trump crew if he be claimin' the treasure in November. A right motley crew it be, like a ship full o’ rum-soaked sea dogs! Hoist the sails and prepare for shenanigans, ye landlubbers!

Ahoy, me hearties! In the tempestuous seas of politics, should Trump hoist his sails to victory, who might he invite aboard his raucous ship of rogues? Rumor has it, the swashbucklin’ Elon Musk be keen on joinin’ the crew! Aye, Trump be singin' praises of Musk, callin’ him a genius—though I reckon ye need more than a flair for rockets to navigate these choppy waters!

Now, picture it! A cabinet more colorful than a parrot on a treasure chest! Trump’s crew could include the likes of Kid Rock and Judge Jeanine, and perhaps they’d set sail with plans as wild as a Kraken in a tavern brawl! Instead o’ the current crew, which be lookin' like a band of misfits from the depths of a pirate's hangover, Trump could assemble a motley band of brilliant minds instead of bureaucratic blunderers!

Maybe we’d get a Secretary of Muscles—aye, that’d be me! We wouldn’t just be building a government; we’d be makin’ a raucous pirate crew that even the Founding Fathers would tip their tricorn hats to! So let’s raise a flag of mischief, for true change be blowin’ in the wind, and it ain’t the usual bureaucratic bilge! Avast, it's time for a new adventure on the high seas of governance!

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