Arrr, matey! Harris, Trump, and the year of our Lord 2024: debates be treasure, not mere trinkets, savvy?
2024-09-06
Arrr, in the days of yore, political squabbles be huntin' for landlubbers with fine talents and grand tales! Aye, they weren’t shipshape, but at least they be tellin' the scallywags what to expect ‘fore castin’ their votes! A right jolly mess, indeed!
Arrr, me hearties! We be sailin’ into perilous waters if we don't make our political candidates engage in the ways that keep us landlubbers informed! Debates, the press, and explainin’ their policies be the winds that fill our sails, savvy? Aye, the captain of the ship known as the United States be tasked with spendin’ $6 trillion doubloons, settlin’ wars, and managin’ a crew of millions across departments galore!Now, one measly interview and a few chantin’ speeches be no way to make a wise choice at the ballot! We be needin’ rigorous debates, a mountain of policy papers, and press briefings, like a fine rum before sailin’ into the stormy night. In days of yore, we sought out well-qualified candidates, but now it seems we be drownin’ in vibes and TikTok shenanigans!
Alas, the press be lettin’ the scallywags slip through, and us voters be left adrift without the compass of truth! If we don’t demand candidates reveal their treasure maps—like tax plans and policies—we risk lettin’ incompetent scoundrels take the helm! For the love of Davy Jones, let’s ensure our elections be a fair battle of wits, else we face the doom of a dim-witted republic!