The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Yearnin' for bare pantry shelves? Cast yer lot fer Kamala Harris, matey!"

2024-09-06

Arrr, matey! Kamala's grand plan t' squash the price-gougers be likely t' leave us starvin' and waitin' in long lines fer me grub! These grog shops be runnin' on naught but crumbs, yet the scallywags in charge be takin' the heat! Blimey, what a swashbucklin' mess!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I regale ye with the tale of Vice Admiral Kamala Harris, who’s set her sights on capping grocery prices like a pirate hoardin’ treasure! Aye, it be soundin' noble to protect the good folk from the dastardly price gougers, but beware! This be a scheme more treacherous than a kraken's embrace!

Ye see, grocery stores be makin’ a profit thinner than a seagull's feather, barely scrappin' by with a mere 1-3%! If ye squeeze the grog from their coffers, they’ll have naught but bones to barter with the farmers who toil in the fields, already weather-beaten by the stormy seas of high costs!

Harris thinks she's huntin’ corporate greed, but it be the supply chain storms, inflation whirlpools, and mother nature's tempest that be causin’ the rise in prices! Her caps on prices could lead to barren shelves, like a ship without a crew, and poor farmers might be cast adrift, their livelihoods lost to the depths!

Aye, this plan be nothing but a fool’s errand! If she truly wants to aid the good folk, she should be supportin’ farmers and fixin' the tangled nets of the supply chain. Instead, she be stirrin’ the pot for a quick political gain! So hoist the sails and steer clear of this ill-fated proposal, lest we all find ourselves in a sea of trouble! Arrr!

Read the Original Article