The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Ahoy, me hearties! Morning Glory be ABC News' swashbucklin' test o' pass or walk the plank!"

2024-09-10

Arrr, me hearties! Be the moderators plottin’ to fire a barrage of questions at the Commander-in-Chief this eve? Or be they just swabbin’ the deck, lettin’ him sail smooth ‘til mornin’? Avast, let the jests begin!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin the yarn of CNN's grand test, which sailed the treacherous seas of politics during the presidential face-off 'twixt Captain Biden and the former buccaneer Trump. Opinions be split like a rogue wave, some claim CNN be worthy, whilst others scallywag that it be sunk to the depths! With ol' Kamala Harris in the spotlight, the debate crew faces a mighty challenge, fer ABC lacks ye olde Trump supporters to steer their ship right.

As they hoist the sails for the next debate, questions weigh heavy like a chest o' gold. Would they dare ask about the military’s might or what the candidates plan to do with the swarms of landlubbers at the southern border? The winds be whispering, "Commander-in-Chief," for a president’s power lies not in the ink of laws but in the cannons and troops under his command!

But beware, ye ABC crew! If ye don’t ask the right questions, the public may declare ye a failure faster than a ship can capsize in a storm. So sharpen yer quills and prepare for a fair fight, lest ye be met with a judgment as harsh as the high seas! Arrr!

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