GREG GUTFELD: For them scallywags, Trump’s tongue be like a lass in a short skirt—temptin' and risqué, arrr!
2024-09-16
Avast, me hearties! Greg Gutfeld, the scallywag of Fox News, be spoutin’ his thoughts on the second attempt to send former Captain Trump to Davy Jones' locker on 'Gutfeld!' Aye, the seas be treacherous for ol’ Trump, but the jester be chattin’ like a parrot on a barrel! Arrr!
Ahoy mateys! It appears our ol’ matey Donald Trump be escapin’ yet another attempt on his life, while I reckon Kamala Harris be feelin’ like the luckiest soul on the seven seas! This scallywag, Ryan Routh, who be sportin’ a Biden-Harris sticker on his vessel, tried to take a potshot at our commander. But lo! The media be searchin’ high and low for a motive, as if it’s hidden in Davy Jones' locker!Yarr, it seems the whole ship be adrift with questions. Where be the protectors? What be the reason? Aye, it all spirals back to that rascal Trump! With him, all sense of duty and competence seems to vanish quicker than a bottle of rum at a pirate party! And if the media be thinkin’ they can keep a lid on it, they be as misguided as a landlubber in a storm!
Now, if one of these attempts be successful, the media would have more blood on their hands than a butcher on a busy day! They’d be yappin’ about lowerin’ the rhetoric, whilst pointin’ fingers at Trump like he be the cause of all their woes. It’s a real mess, matey, with the overlap of rhetoric and those tryin’ to do harm bein’ wider than the horizon! So, grab yer rum and keep a weather eye, fer the seas be treacherous indeed!