The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr! Schools be sinkin' our young mateys, parents! Heed me call, lest ye crew be left adrift!"

2024-09-17

Arrr, me hearties! By the beard of Poseidon, I be baffled why learnin' ain’t the grandest treasure on the high seas! Schools be sinkin’ faster than a ship with a hole, leavin' our young scallywags adrift. Raise the flag for knowledge, or we be lost at sea!

Arrr matey! Gather ‘round as I spin ye a yarn ‘bout the sorry state o’ learnin’ in the fair city o’ Baltimore! A year past, it came to light that 23 schools there be havin' nary a single scallywag proficient in math! Aye, that be a thousand of 'em clueless like a ship without a sail. And as if that weren’t enough, 20 more schools had but a handful o' students who could count to ten without takin’ off their boots!

The blame be flyin’ like cannonballs! Citizens be pointin' fingers at the government and teachers, yet they be forgettin’ to look in the mirror! Aye, the scallywags in charge may be useless, but where be the parents marchin’ to demand better for their wee ones? Where be the banners sayin’, “Enough be enough!”? Instead, they be sittin’ on their hands, lettin’ the schools sink like a ship full o’ treasure to Davy Jones' locker!

Now, I ain’t sayin’ it be easy with jobs a-plenty to juggle, but ye best be raisin' yer young’uns! For if ye don’t, they’ll be left flounderin’ in the deep waters of ignorance, fightin’ for scraps in a world that be demandin' more than parley! So hoist the sails, take the helm, and let's make education the treasure worth seekin’! Arrr!

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