"Arrr, matey! Trump be claimin’, ‘Whatever I do, the scallywags’ll scream it’s all politics, savvy?’”
2024-10-08
Arrr! Former Captain Trump be chattin' ’bout how the Biden-Harris crew be handle'n Hurricane Helene on 'The Ingraham Angle.' Aye, it be like a ship in a tempest, all flappin' sails and no rum in sight! Avast, where be the treasure in this storm?
Avast ye scallywags! Former Captain Trump be takin' a swing at the Biden-Harris crew over their feeble response to the tempest known as Hurricane Helene. With a hearty laugh, he claimed, "Arrr, I’d have a fine crew here, but they be lackin’ the numbers!" Aye, he made this jest during a raucous rally in Butler, Pennsylvania, where a would-be assassin once tried to send him to Davy Jones’ locker!In the midst of the stormy discourse, the FEMA lass, Deanne Criswell, declared that they were indeed on the scene, whether or not ye could spy their shirts. "We be bringin’ supplies like a band of merry sailors!" she proclaimed. Meanwhile, Captain Biden ordered more troops to lend a hand in the recovery, as more than 6,100 National Guardsmen and a legion of federal personnel scrambled to help the beleaguered folk of North Carolina.
Trump, not one to shy away, jested that even after disaster struck, folks would trudge to the voting booths, "Even if they be crawlin’!" Aye, he was sure that the storm's aftermath might turn the tides in his favor come voting time, for the response had been as dreadful as a kraken’s breath. With a wink and a nod, the saga of Helene continues, much to the delight of the gossiping tides!