Ahoy, me hearties! I be Dave McCormick, and here's why I crave yer precious votes for the Senate treasure!
2024-10-30
Ahoy, me hearties! I'm a scallywag from the land o' Penn's folks, seven generations deep! A landlubber turned seafaring senator, I be a rogue in politics and a trader in gold! I learned me code of 'Duty, Honor, and Country' aboard the king’s ship! Arrr!
Avast ye landlubbers! Our fair Commonwealth be stuck in a quagmire, and a change be a-brewin’! Pennsylvanians be feelin' the sting of the policies o’ Senator Bob Casey and Vice President Harris like a cannonball to the gut! Aye, nearly 60% be sayin’ the ship be sailin’ in the wrong direction! Prices be risin’ faster than a rum barrel at a pirate feast!If ye be wantin’ more o’ the same, vote for the ol’ sea dog Casey, but if ye crave a new course after the stormy seas o’ inflation and crime, I be the captain for ye! I hail from the fine land of Pennsylvania, trained to wrestle with the best o' them, and served me time as a paratrooper, fightin’ for our great nation! I’ve created jobs and fought the good fight against the winds o’ change that be blowin’ through our fair state!
Casey be a 30-year sea turtle, anchored down in Washington, spendin’ like a drunken sailor and losin' us our gold! As yer potential senator, I promise to hoist the sails of change—lowerin’ prices, creatin’ jobs, and supportin’ our brave law enforcement! So, cast yer votes wisely, me hearties, and let’s steer Pennsylvania toward brighter horizons!