"Avast, me hearties! We might not hoist the sails straightaway, but we're chartin' a course fer fairer winds!"
2024-11-06
Arrr, me hearties! The crew o' the 'Gutfeld!' ship be squawkin' like parrots over Trump’s thunderous win in the 2024 election! Aye, the seas be churning with laughter as the captain sails to victory, leaving the opposition in Davy Jones' locker! Hoist the Jolly Roger and pass the rum!
Arrr, mates! 'Tis true, Kamala Harris met her fate worse than a shipwreck on the high seas! She be avoidin' her supporters like a scallywag dodgin' a cannonball. For once, not a chuckle escaped her lips, and I say, that be downright hilarious! The esteemed Jake Tapper had a jolly ol' time discoverin' that ol’ Kamala be overperformin' like a drunken sailor, yet in nary a place did she score better than Biden! Aye, Trump be the victor by more than five million votes, leavin' the Democrats in a muddle more tangled than a fishnet.Now, the landlubbers in the media thought they could spin a yarn about polls and public sentiment, but they were as accurate as a pirate's aim after a barrel o' rum! It’s clear: the legacy media be a sunken ship! And Hollywood? They’re like washed-up buccaneers, thinkin’ their virtue signals matter. Identity politics, ye say? Dead as a doornail! Folks just want safety and prosperity, not to be divided into categories more absurd than a parrot that talks back.
In the end, it be not just Trump but the American spirit that sailed forth! So hoist the sails, me hearties! Change be a-comin’, and we be headin’ towards a brighter horizon!