"Arrr, matey! Both factions be at peril o' catchin’ the wrong winds from Trump’s triumphant sailin’!"
2024-11-10
Arrr, me hearties! Columnist David Marcus be sayin’ the election that hoisted Trump back to the captain's chair be simpler than a parrot’s squawk! Give the treasure to the good ol' American crew, not those scallywag influencers and podcastin' bilge rats! Avast, let’s raise the Jolly Roger!
Arrr, me hearties! In the wake of that raucous election where President-Elect Trump found himself clutchin' the victory flag, both landlubbers on the left and right be spoutin' tales 'bout how the mystical new media—like that scallywag Joe Rogan’s podcast and the infamous X platform—be the secret treasure o' his success!But hold yer horses, mateys! As I chatted with the good folk o' the land, it be clear that the truth be as murky as the ocean depths. Both sides be wantin’ a scapegoat to excuse their blunders. The Democrats, busy blastin' Musk's newfangled media, forget that voters be more concerned about their empty bellies and the state of their homes than any shiny podcast.
And on the right, they be foolin' themselves thinkin’ they’ve struck gold with citizen journos and podcasts. Nay! It be the good people seein’ the ship goin' the wrong way that decided this election, not flashy influencers! The woes o' the economy and a less-than-stellar candidate named Kamala Harris be the real culprits.
So, let this be a lesson, me hearties! If the GOP hopes to keep sailin’ smooth, they best be fixin’ the leaky sink and shoddy border, not just raisin’ their sails to the winds o’ new media, lest they find themselves marooned come the next election!