The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr, matey! The scallywags of the media be pointin' fingers at all but their own bilge-suckin' selves!"

2024-11-11

Arrr, me hearty! The crew on "Gutfeld!" be chortlin’ like scallywags, takin’ a jibe at the ruckus o’ the media’s blarney 'bout the 2024 captaincy! Aye, they be swabbin' the decks with laughter, as the news be more twisted than a kraken’s tentacle! Ha har!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round and lend yer ears, for the media be in a right pickle, pointin' fingers like scallywags at all but themselves! They be likin' the sneaky sea serpent, disposin' of truth while claimin' to search for it. Aye, they be covered in more than just tomato sauce, actin' like they be the gallant crew when in truth, they be the ones slackin' off at the helm!

Now, as the Democrats be bein’ like a ship without a compass, they be finally realizin' that their ol' trusty woke flag be flappin' in the wind of change. Aye, even their beloved Kamala be losin' votes faster than a ship sinks after hit by a cannonball, and they be lookin' to blame every soul under the sun, but perhaps the reflection in the mirror be the true culprit!

And what about the captain of confusion, Joe Biden? Aye, he be makin’ promises thicker than a fog bank, yet the seas of political fortune be choppin' rough! With cries of “fascism” as common as parrot squawks, the real question be: why not make Kamala the captain now? If they truly reckon she be denied her rightful place due to wicked prejudices, then why not give her the helm, eh? The tides be turnin’, and the crew be wonderin' who the real scallywags be now!

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