The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, I be the captain of Dallas, matey! Me jump to the GOP be a jolly jolt for them Democrats!

2024-11-18

Arrr, I be the captain of Dallas, Texas, matey! Me worries 'bout crime be clashin' with them Democrats wantin' to sink the coppers. So, I hoisted the Jolly Roger and joined the Republicans! Aye, me old crew just don’t be seein’ the storm brewin'!

Arrr mateys, gather 'round! A year gone by, I set sail on a new course and joined the Republican crew, as mayor of Dallas, Texas! Aye, I knew the scallywags from the Democrat side would come a-callin' with their mockery and jests, but I knew it be the right choice. Their priorities be as off-course as a ship in a storm!

Look ye here, many a soul of color be jumpin' ship from the chaos and financial squall Democrats be causin'. I be standin' firm for law and order, low taxes, and the desire to live free like a captain on the open seas! And let me tell ye, Trump be understandin' our hopes, not just our fears of the blundering Democrats!

While the Democrats be flounderin' in their own mess with their “defund the police” nonsense, I called for more investment in safety—an' lo and behold, crime be droppin' in Dallas! Aye, Trump be breakin’ down the Democrats' blue wall, showin' that the folks in cities desire more than mere lip service!

In a nutshell, the voters be fed up with the Democrats’ pandering and be lookin' for a captain who wants to Make America Great Again! As a working-class sailor, I feel right at home in the Republican fleet, ready to sail into brighter waters! Yarrr!

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