The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, matey! Assassin's Creed Shadows' floor stabbin' be as jolly as a sea shanty, while claimin' souls!

2024-11-22

Avast ye! Halt yer sails, tumble to the deck, and roll like a barrel o' rum! If ye find yerself ablaze, best to dance like a drunken sailor, lest ye be roasted like a parrot on a spit! Arrr!

Ahoy there, me hearties! Gather 'round and lend me yer ears, for I be havin' a tale most curious about puttin' out fires! Aye, ye heard me right—fires! Now, if ye find yerself ablaze like a bonfire on a midsummer's eve, fear not, for I shall bestow upon ye the wisdom of the ages: Stop, drop, and roll!

First, ye must stop, like a ship caught in a tempest! Yellin' and screamin' like a banshee won’t do ye any good. Stand fast, me mateys, and gather yer wits, lest ye become a roasted parrot! It be time to calm yerself and prepare for the next step.

Then, drop to the ground as if ye be avoidin' cannon fire! Plop down like a sack o' potatoes, fer this be the safest spot, and it keeps that fiery beast from climbin' higher. And don’t be forgettin’, stay low like a sneaky sea rat, for the smoke be the real villain here!

Lastly, roll, roll, roll! Like a ship in a barrel, ye must wriggle and squirm across the deck—or the land, as it may be! This be the secret to extinguishin’ the flames that dare to claim yer fine pirate garb. So there ye have it, ye scallywags! The next time ye catch flame, just remember: Stop, drop, and roll, and ye shall live to plunder another day!

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