The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Aaron Rodgers be dodgin' the doc's gaze to keep his ship from bein' marooned on the bench, savvy?

2024-11-24

Arrr, matey! Our scallywag Aaron Rodgers be lookin' as fit as a three-legged sea turtle! Yet, he’s dodgin' them pesky scans like a crafty bilge rat, all to keep his boots on the deck! Aye, fear not, for the treasure of the game be worth the peril!

Arrr, me hearties! It be lookin’ like the famed Aaron Rodgers, soon to be 41, be sailin’ in rough waters o’ health! Last year, he met a treacherous fate, rupturin’ his Achilles on but the fourth snap in his new Jet colors. Yet, in a miraculous week against the Patriots, it seemed the ol’ sea dog had found the fountain of youth!

Alas, since that fateful week, he’s been hobblin’ about like a scallywag with a peg leg! Rumor has it this crafty quarterback is dodgin’ scans like a pirate avoidin’ the law, not wishin’ to reveal his injuries for fear of bein’ sent to the bench. Aye, one can’t blame the lad for wantin’ to stay in the game, but it be clear he’s a cog in the problem ship, not the solution.

The Jets, alas, be in dire straits with a woeful 3-8 record, firin’ their captain, Joe Douglas, and other mates. The winds suggest that Rodgers may not even return next season, and if he hopes to stay aboard, he best get his sea legs back soon! With stats fallin’ faster than a cannonball, it be a tumultuous tide for this once-great quarterback!

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