"Arrr, Captain Gus Malzahn be jumpin' ship to plunder the Florida State crew as their offensive matey! Har har!"
2024-11-30
Arrr, mateys! The fine crew o' the University of Central Florida be huntin' fer a new captain o' the gridiron, as Gus Malzahn has sailed away to be an assistant in Tallahassee. Avast! Who'll steer this ship through the stormy seas o' football now?
Ahoy, me hearties! It be a stormy day fer the UCF Knights, fer their captain, Gus Malzahn, be weighin’ anchor after four years plunderin’ in Orlando’s waters. He’s off t’ be the offensive quartermaster fer the Florida State crew, as reported by the wise sages at ESPN.In his farewell match, the Knights found themselves on the wrong side o’ a 28-14 battle against the fierce Utah ship, sinking his record to 28-24. UCF be thankin’ Malzahn fer his service, expressin’ gratitude fer his gallant efforts as they sailed into the treacherous waters of the Big 12 Conference.
But alas, the last two seasons be a rough sea, with the crew finishin’ the 2023 campaign at 6-6 and then capsize in the Gasparilla Bowl against the Georgia Tech marauders. With four quarterbacks takin’ turns at the helm, it be no wonder the Knights found themselves adrift with a 2-7 record in conference play, their worst since the infamous 2015.
Now Malzahn be settin’ his sights on Florida State, tasked with repairin’ their leaky ship, which be ranked 131st out of 134 crews in offense. Aye, it be a mighty challenge, but this pirate be ready fer the adventure ahead! Arrr!