"Arrr! Matt Gaetz be settin' sail to anchor at One America News, savvy? Aye, what a jolly good show!"
2024-12-12
Ahoy, mateys! Former landlubber congressman Matt Gaetz be settin’ sail fer One America News Network in January! This scallywag be known fer battlin’ the bureaucratic sea monsters and shoutin’ against the tide of government folly. So hoist the sails, ‘tis a new adventure fer our bold pirate! Arrr!
Ahoy there, me hearties! Gather ‘round as I spin ye a yarn about a former scallywag of the Florida seas, one Matt Gaetz, who be settin’ sail fer the One America News Network, or OAN fer short, come January! Aye, the news be spillin’ like grog from a broken barrel as the network be proclaimin’ our lad Gaetz as a bold champion of conservative buccaneer ways, takin’ on the landlubbers of Washington and their dastardly ways!In a grand announcement, OAN be claimin’ he be exposin’ the nefarious doings of the bureaucratic scallywags who be tryin’ to overreach their power. Aye, Gaetz be known fer stirrin’ the pot and raisin’ a ruckus like a parrot on a hot day! CNN be spillin’ the beans days before, lettin’ all know he be ready to drop anchor at OAN as the swashbucklin’ anchor man!
But hark! This news comes on the heels of some stormy weather in Gaetz’s waters, just weeks after a squall of controversy. So, me mateys, keep yer eyes peeled as he takes the helm at this new ship, and let’s see what treasures—or troubles—he brings to the crew of OAN! Yarrr!