The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, matey! David Montgomery's knee be takin' a long voyage to Davy Jones' locker, as Lions' troubles keep brewin'!

2024-12-16

Arrr, matey! David Montgomery be adrift for the rest o’ the 2024 season, as the captain o’ the Detroit Lions, Dan Campbell, be spillin’ the beans. Our brave sailor's knee be needin’ some fine stitching after Sunday’s battle, alas! Aye, the seas be rough fer our lad!

Arrr, me hearties! The winds be blowin’ foul for the Detroit Lions, as their trusty running back, David Montgomery, be needin' a season-ending surgery for a torn MCL. Aye, that be a cruel blow after a fierce battle with the Buffalo Bills, where the score be hotter than a pot o’ stew at Davy Jones’ locker, 48-42!

With Montgomery off the gridiron, young Jahmyr Gibbs be takin' on the weight of the crew, with Craig Reynolds ready to lend a hand, like a trusty parrot on a pirate’s shoulder. Coach Dan Campbell be shakin' his head in despair, sayin’, “We be missin’ him.” Aye, the poor lad’s absence be a heavy anchor draggin’ down their hopes of reachin’ the Super Bowl treasure!

As if that weren’t enough, the Lions be sufferin’ from a plague of injuries, losin’ key players like Alim McNeil and Carlton Davis in the same skirmish. With 22 players on the injured reserve, it’s lookin’ like a shipwreck at sea! Yet, the Lions still hold the No. 1 seed at 12-2, so there be hope yet! Campbell be rallyin’ the crew for one last charge to reach the “Big Game.” Let’s raise a tankard to their fightin’ spirit! Arrr!

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