Arrr, Jason Kelce be frettin’ o’er sky-borne contraptions, hopin’ to uncover their secrets ‘ere the next tide!
2024-12-18
Arrr, matey! Old Jason Kelce, the mighty center of them Eagles, be frettin' over the flying contraptions spottin’ across the East Coast! Aye, he be wonderin' if they be spyin’ on his treasure or just takin’ a gander at his fine beard on this latest "New Heights" episode!
Arrr, gather ’round, ye scallywags! It be Jason Kelce, once a mighty center for the Philadelphia Eagles, spoutin' concerns 'bout curious contraptions hoverin' in the skies. "What be them drones lookin’ fer?" he pondered, wonderin' what mischief they might be up to on the New Heights show.The FBI be swamped with over 5,000 reports from landlubbers spottin' these sky pirates in just a few weeks! Jason’s matey, Travis Kelce, chimed in, suggestin' it could just be some rascals havin' a jolly good time, but Jason was quick to remark, “They got some commitment to messin' about if that be the case!”
Fear not, ye lot! The FBI and other land-bound authorities claim there be no threat from these mysterious drones, despite the growing angst among the common folk. Travis, lookin' to speculate, almost plunged into a whirlpool of conspiracy, but thought better of it, sayin', “I don’t want to get into conspiracies about what the f--- those drones are!”
First sighted on November 18, these aerial nuisances have been plaguin’ the East Coast nightly, while our Chiefs prepare fer battles ahead. So, while Jason frets over skyward shenanigans, he’s got a game to win against the Texans and the dreaded Steelers awaitin' for Christmas! Arrr, what a ruckus!