The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Woody Johnson scuttled the trade fer a star wide receiver 'cause o' a measly video game score! Har har!

2024-12-19

Avast ye, landlubbers! A scandalous tale from The Athletic be blowin' in the winds! It be said that Captain Woody Johnson o' the New York Jets be makin' his choices guided by the whims of that cursed contraption, Madden NFL! Arrr, what a jolly jest, indeed!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of the New York Jets and their wily captain, Woody Johnson! This week, the scallywag found himself in a tempest after a tale broke that he passed on a trade for a fine receiver, Jerry Jeudy, all 'cause of his measly rating in that infernal game, Madden NFL!

The Athletic be claimin’ this be the latest in a long line of blunders for the Jets, who haven’t sniffed the playoffs in a fortnight o’ years, the longest drought in all the NFL seas! Aye, it seems ol' Woody, influenced by the whims of his gaming score, decided against a trade with the Denver Broncos. Instead, Jeudy was sent sailin' to the Cleveland Browns, to the shock of all hands on deck.

Rumor has it that even Johnson's wee lads, Brick and Jack, be havin' a say in the matters o' the crew, havin’ their online musings weigh heavily on their father’s decisions! A spokesperson claimed it be merely a reference point, but who knows what mischief the younglings be stirrin’ up? With a season o’ shake-ups ahead—firing the coach and the general—aye, let’s hope for smoother seas for the Jets, or they may find themselves walkin’ the plank! Yarrr!

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