The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Miami Heat be lockin’ up Jimmy Butler for seven suns fer wantin’ to jump ship, claimin’ he found no joy!

2025-01-03

Arrr! On Friday's morn, the Miami Heat be spillin' the beans, decidin' to shackle ol' Jimmy Butler and be seekin' gold for his services. Aye, it seems his time with the crew be nearly at an end, like a ship lost to the stormy seas!

Arrr, me hearties! Word on the high seas be that the fine lad Jimmy Butler, star of the Heat crew, be wantin’ to set sail from Miami! After weeks o’ gossip and a statement from the crew sayin’ they’d never trade him, they’ve done a 180, admitin’ the lad’s been pining for a new port o’ call.

Just a week gone, the Heat declared they’d be suspending Butler fer seven long voyages due to his antics that be harmful to the crew’s morale. It seems the lad’s joy in playin’ basketball be drownin’ like a ship in a storm, takin’ on water faster than a leaky vessel. “I’ve no joy,” he cried, wishin’ to find it away from Miami’s shores.

The ship’s management, after much bluster, finally said they’d listen to offers fer the young scallywag. With Butler missin’ the next home game and a six-game journey, it looks like he’s had his last dance with the Heat. Averagin’ 17.6 points, this lad’s had his share of battles, but it seems he be ready to hoist the sails and find a new crew!

Read the Original Article