The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, the dolphins' Tua be limpin’ like a scallywag, unlikely to join the fray with glory on the line!

2025-01-04

Arrr, listen ye scallywags! Cap'n Mike McDaniel be sayin' that our fearless leader, Tua, be less likely to set sail against the Jets, what with his poor hip ailment. Aye, that lad needs to mend before we plunder the seas again!

Avast ye hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of the Miami Dolphins, who be settin' sail for a playoff berth but may be doin' so without their fearless captain, Tua Tagovailoa, against the New York Jets this Sunday. The wise head coach, Mike McDaniel, be sayin' there’s a good chance Tua be takin’ a wee break due to his sore hip, leavin' the fate of the crew in the hands of Tyler "Snoop" Huntley.

This Huntley lad be no scallywag, mind ye! Just last week, he led the crew to a grand victory over the Cleveland Browns, completin’ a fine 22 out of 26 passes, with a nifty touchdown tossed in fer good measure. If the Dolphins can best the Jets and the Kansas City Chiefs can send them pesky Broncos to Davy Jones' locker, the Dolphins shall claim their spot as the No. 7 seed in the AFC!

Now, if the seas be kind and the Dolphins find their way to the playoffs, Tua be swearin’ on his ship’s honor that he’ll be back on the field! So, let’s raise a flagon of grog and hope the cards fall in their favor, or else they’ll be walkin’ the plank without their star quarterback! Arrr!

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