Arrr, matey! The judge be sayin' Trump’s a scallywag, yet no time in the brig! What a jest!
2025-01-04
Arrr, matey! The captain-elect, Donald Trump, be sentenced fer 34 counts o' trickery with his treasure maps! But fear not, the judge says he won't be walkin' the plank. Come January 10, he be the first scallywag to rule the seas o’ America, even with a record!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round and lend me yer ears, fer I bring tidings from the landlubber shores of politics! Our soon-to-be captain of the ship known as America, President-elect Donald Trump, be in a wee bit o' trouble. Aye, he be havin’ 34 counts o’ falsifyin’ business records hangin' over his head like a storm cloud on a swelterin’ day!On the day o’ reckonin’, January 10, the judge be settin’ the sails for his sentencing, but fear not, landlubbers! It be soundin’ like our Donald shan’t be makin’ a visit to Davy Jones’ locker, as he’s not expected to face the cold iron bars o’ jail time. A right good fortune, fer he’ll be sworn in on January 20, makin’ him the first felon to ever steer this grand ship of a nation!
Now, how’s that fer a merry tale? A pirate’s life is full o’ mischief, but it seems the seas of politics be even stormier! So, let us raise a tankard o’ grog to our new captain, who’ll be walkin’ the plank o’ history, a felonious swashbuckler capturin’ the high seas of the Oval Office!