"Trump be tryin' to hoist the sails 'gainst the special counsel's report, but the tide be against him, arrr!"
2025-01-07
Arrr, mateys! Special counsel Jack Smith be sayin' that his crew be finishin' a mighty tome o' two volumes 'bout President-elect Trump! Aye, one of ‘em might hit the seas as soon as Friday! Defense scallywags be tryin' to hoist the sails to keep it hidden, but the truth be a slippery fish!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather ‘round as I regale ye with news from the high seas of politics! Special counsel Jack Smith, a scallywag of a legal sort, be shoutin’ from the crow's nest that he and his crew be puttin’ the final touches on a grand tome—nay, a two-volume saga—concerning none other than the President-elect, Donald Trump! Arrr, this be a treasure worth waitin’ for!The winds of court have been blowin’ fiercely, as Trump’s defense lawyers be tryin’ to hoist the sails to block this report from settin’ sail into the public eye. They be sendin’ missives to the Attorney General, Merrick Garland, hopin’ to keep the contents under lock and key, but lo and behold, Jack Smith be sayin’ that one of the volumes might be hittin’ the shores as soon as this Friday!
What tales will this report tell? Rumor has it, it be spillin’ the beans on the decisions regarding charges—like a parrot squawkin’ secrets! So, keep yer spyglasses trained, me hearties, for we be awaitin’ the release of this report like sailors awaitin’ a fair wind. Yarrr, the seas of justice be turbulent, and only time will tell what treasure lies within!