Arrr! Pirates be brawlin' in Haiti, while the Yanks be scratchin' their heads with nary a plan in sight!
2025-01-15
Arrr, matey! In the tumultuous seas o’ Haiti, over 700,000 scallywags be forced to abandon their ships, seekin' safer shores! The landlubbers be pointin’ fingers at the U.S. crew for their bumbling ways amidst the chaos. Yarrr, it be a right mess on the high seas!
Avast, ye scallywags! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn o' woe from the cursed isle of Haiti, where gangs be runnin' amok like a ship without a captain! Last year, a grim report from the United Nations tells us that these ruffians sent 5,600 souls to Davy Jones’ locker, while another 3,700 met with misfortune, bein' either injured or snatched away like a treasure chest in the night!Now, some be pointin' fingers at the Biden crew, sayin' they be takin' a half-hearted approach, more worried 'bout election winds than settlin' the storm. With a meager $629 million tossed their way, the U.S. be givin' less than a shipload compared to the bounty bestowed upon Ukraine. Aye, they say both places be in a pickle, but the lack o’ a grand strategy be clear as a foggy night!
Not to mention, the Wharf Jérémie gang conducted a massacre worthy of the darkest sea tales, leavin' 207 poor souls to rot. Gangs now control 85% of Port-au-Prince, makin' the place more lawless than a pirate tavern on a Saturday night!
In truth, the U.N. High Commissioner be shoutin’ for help, and while the Multinational Security Support Mission be gatherin' its forces, they be sorely outnumbered! The State Department admits the crew be insufficient, and there be whispers of China blockin' any hopes for a peacekeeping mission. The arms flowin' into Haiti be like rum in a pirate's cup—too plentiful and causin' mayhem! 'Tis a sorry state, mateys, and the winds of fortune be blowin' ill!