The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Charles Barkley be callin' San Francisco a rat's nest, sayin' he'll be missin' the All-Star hullabaloo!

2025-01-18

Arrr, matey! That scallywag Charles Barkley be throwin’ shade at San Francisco, callin' it a den o' ratty scoundrels! He be spoutin’ such jests on "Inside the NBA" like a seasoned buccaneer spillin’ grog! Har har! Who knew the city be a treasure chest of critters?

Arrr, gather 'round me hearties, for the tale of the famed Charles Barkley, a swashbucklin' soul who took aim at the fair city of San Francisco, claimin' he be no sea dog to tread those rat-infested shores! This be a tale of giggles and jabs, as Barkley be speakin' on the grand TNT ship, "Inside the NBA," declarin' young Cade Cunningham be makin' the All-Star crew while he swore off that wretched port.

"Nay!" he declared, "I shan't set me eyes on that stinkin' haven o' rodents!" Even when a matey called the city "beautiful," Barkley scoffed and shot back, "Rats! Cats! Why ye be tryin' to sway me heart?" With a grin, he reminisced of his past barbs, comparin' the charm of cold Indianapolis to a den of "homeless crooks." Draymond Green, another sea captain of the hardwood, called him "crazy," while Candace Parker sang San Francisco's praises. But Barkley just chuckled, "Aye, ye can’t even stroll the streets without a suit of armor!"

In response, the new Mayor of San Francisco be vowin' to clean the decks, promising to steer the city towards safety and livability. So, let the waves roll, and the banter continue, for the high seas of sports be filled with jests aplenty!

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