The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Wayne Gretzky be at Trump’s hoedown, as the captain be eyein’ the hockey legend for Canadian rule! Har har!

2025-01-20

Arrr, me hearties! Spotted at Trump’s grand hullabaloo, none other than the legendary Wayne Gretzky! The scallywag president jested, “Let’s crown ‘The Great One’ as our next Canadian captain!” Avast, what a merry jest, I say! Sharks and barnacles, what next for this wild sea of politics?

Arrr, me hearties! Gather 'round for a tale of the ice and politics, where the legend Wayne Gretzky, the esteemed “Great One” of hockey fame, was spotted at none other than Trump’s grand inauguration! Aye, he be sittin' next to the likes of Dallas Mavericks' owner and one fierce UFC captain, Dana White, as they all watched the fancy folk waltz into the Capitol.

Now, it be said that the raucous Trump has a wild notion, suggestin’ that Gretzky should don the crown of Canada’s prime minister! Aye, on the jolly day of Christmas, Trump himself urged the good Canadian folk to rally behind their hockey hero. “Run for Prime Minister, Wayne!” he bellowed, “Ye wouldn’t even need to campaign!”

But alas, poor Wayne showed no interest in lettin' go of his hockey stick for a political quill. Trump, ever the jester, pondered a “DRAFT WAYNE GRETZKY” movement for a bit o’ fun! “I can’t imagine anyone doin’ better,” he exclaimed, suggestin’ even the title of “Governor of Canada!” The Great One seemed unbothered by the hullabaloo, but ye never know what schemes may unfold on the high seas of politics! Yarr!

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