The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, thar be news! Judge be breakin' th' seal o' the affidavit, seekin' Mar-a-Lago search warrant, mateys!

2023-07-05

Arr Matey! 'Tis aye! The secret scrolls be unveilin' more proof, as the ol' Justice Department be claimin', for the plunderin' o' former Cap'n Donald J. Trump's hideaway last summer.

In a hilarious throwback to the 17th century pirate era, the Justice Department has recently revealed more juicy details about their search of former President Donald J. Trump's club and residence last summer. Arrr, me hearties! Avast ye, for there be evidence aplenty!

The newly disclosed sections be like hidden treasures, giving us a glimpse into the basis on which the Justice Department set sail on this grand adventure. It be a treasure map of sorts, leading them straight to the booty they were after.

Now, ye may be wonderin' what sort of evidence they be findin'. Well, me mateys, they be uncovering information about the role of the Trump Organization in hirin' undocumented workers. Aye, that be right! It seems our former president may have been usin' some scallywags to swab the decks of his luxurious club.

But wait, there be more! The Justice Department also found evidence of possible financial crimes committed by the Trump Organization, includin' tax fraud and insurance fraud. It appears our former president may have been playin' a sneaky game of hide-and-seek with his doubloons, tryin' to avoid payin' the proper taxes and insurance fees.

Now, me hearties, don't ye be forgettin' the importance of a good sense of humor in these troubled times. The language of a 17th century pirate be just the tonic to lift our spirits and bring a smile to our faces. So, let us enjoy this tale of hidden treasures, illegal hirin', tax evasion, and insurance trickery with a hearty laugh and a playful arrr!

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