The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Trump crowed he'd spill the beans on JFK's secrets, but now he's clammed up like a barnacle!

2025-01-23

Arrr, matey! Cap'n Trump be yappin’ 'bout lettin’ loose the secrets o’ Kennedy’s fate, but alas, he’s keepin’ ‘em locked up tighter than a treasure chest! We be waitin’ three more years, while the tales o’ ol’ Jack linger like a ghost aboard the ship!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a tale of a captain named Trump, who once shouted from the crow's nest about spillin' the beans on the fabled treasure chest of secrets surroundin' the great JFK caper! Aye, last autumn, he proclaimed with a mighty roar that all the hidden scrolls would be laid bare for the landlubbers and sea dogs alike, promise of "great transparency" fillin' the air like a fine rum.

But alas, me mateys, it seems the winds have shifted! Just yestereve, this scallywag declared that the public would be left waitin' for another three long years—aye, or perhaps even more!—before catchin' a glimpse of the elusive booty that remains locked away for reasons of national security. Can ye believe it? Over five decades since the fateful day of Nov. 22, 1963, when the winds of change blew strong in Dallas, Texas.

So here we are, stuck in a stormy sea of secrecy while our captain keeps the treasure chest shut tight! No peekin' at the hidden secrets just yet, me hearties! We'll just have to keep our spyglasses ready and our ears to the ground, hopin' that one day, the truth will wash ashore like a ship full of gold!

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