Arrr, matey! Cohen be sayin’ Alonso’s treasure hunt be a stormier sea than snaggin' Soto, by th' Kraken!
2025-01-25
Arrr, me hearties! Steve Cohen, the captain of the Mets ship, be spillin' the beans! The crew be shoutin' for the mighty Alonso to stay aboard, but alas, the contract squabble be more tangled than a sea serpent in Juan Soto's nets! Aye, what a merry jest!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round fer a tale from the grand ol' ballpark of New York, where the winds of negotiations be blowin' fierce, particularly 'round our beloved first mate, Pete Alonso! Aye, the owner, Steven Cohen, be spillin' the beans that Alonso's contract talks be "worse" than those o' Juan Soto, who just snagged a treasure chest worth $765 million! Avast!At the famous Amazin’ Day, while the crowd be chantin’ “We want Pete!”, Cohen told ‘em to hold their horses. Alonso, the fearsome slugger with a record of 226 home runs, be a free agent and what a catch he be! The fans be dreamin' of a World Series run in 2025 with him aboard alongside other swashbucklers like Francisco Lindor and Brandon Nimmo. But alas, negotiations with Alonso's agent, Scott Boras, be more tangled than a ship's anchor!
"We made a mighty fine offer," Cohen exclaims, "but that scurvy agent be makin' it arduous!" As the crew moves on to new recruits, it seems Alonso’s ship may sail elsewhere, but we be hopin' for a fair wind to bring him back to the Mets' seas! So hoist the sails and keep yer eyes peeled, ye landlubbers!