Arrr, this lady sailor be wailin' 'bout her pointy shoes, yet still be trouncin' the lot o' scallywags!
2025-01-28
Arrr, ye scallywags! Sadie, the swift-footed lass from the Rochester seas, be bemoanin’ her cursed spikes, yet still trounced the competition in the 200-meter sprint by a whole second! A true treasure of speed, even when her footwear be actin’ like a barnacle on a ship’s hull!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round, fer I be regalin’ ye with a tale from the high seas of track and field, where a brave lass named Sadie Schreiner from the Rochester Institute of Technology be makin’ waves in the women’s league!This scallywag, with a swiftness akin to a cannonball, did triumph in the 200-meter race, cruisin’ past the finish line in a merry 25.17 seconds, leavin’ her competitors in the dust, like barnacles on a ship's hull! The second place wench, Lexi Rodriguez, be laggin’ far behind at 26.92 seconds.
But lo! Sadie, ever the humble buccaneer, declared on Instagram that her sails weren’t full this time, with woes of loose spikes and a less-than-stellar start. Fear not, for the season be young, and she vows to unleash her full fury at the nationals, brandishin’ a transgender pride flag emoji like a pirate's jolly roger!
Despite the storms brewin’ in the NCAA waters regardin’ inclusivity, this fierce competitor stands firm, fightin’ for her place amongst the fairer sex. With a treasure chest of accolades from last season, she be sailin’ strong at RIT, ready to plunder more victories in the races ahead!