"Arrr! Blue state cap’n be spittin’ fire at Trump fer attackin' DEI treasures after that sky beast fell in DC!"
2025-01-31
Arrr, matey! Gov’nor Pritzker be chasin’ the winds, claimin’ Cap’n Trump be steerin’ the ship wrong! He be sayin’ them DEI programs be makin’ the FAA forget about keepin’ the crew safe while the American Airlines galleon be crashin’. Aye, what a jolly mess!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of a scrap o' words between Governor JB Pritzker and the infamous Captain Trump! Pritzker, the democratic scallywag from Illinois, be callin' Trump a landlubber unfit to steer the ship o' state after the tragic crash in D.C. Trump, in his salty wisdom, be blamin' the FAA's quest for diversity as the cause of the calamity!"Arrr, don’t ye be pointin' fingers!" Pritzker roared, demandin' answers like a captain seekin' treasure. He be askin' why the control tower was not fully manned, and if the Trump crew be firin' key sailors who keep our skies safe! Meanwhile, Trump, in his usual swagger, be throwin' mud at Pritzker, callin' him "Sloppy J.B." and sayin' he be turnin' Illinois into a ghost ship.
But hold yer horses! Trump, with his canny sense, claimed that diversity hiring be the cause of the crash, makin' a ruckus over air traffic controllers bein' hired with "severe disabilities." Oi, what a hullabaloo! Pritzker be demandin' that Trump answer questions before the crew mayhem spreads. As the winds blow and tempers flare, it seems both sides be battlin' for the crown, eyein' the horizon for the 2028 captaincy! Arrr!