Arrr, matey! Starting Saturday, Trump be slappin' tariffs on Canada, Mexico, and China—time to hoist the sails of trade!
2025-02-01
Arrr, mateys! After weeks o' chasin' shadows, the White House be spillin' the beans! Cap'n Trump be settin' sail with hefty tariffs—25% on our neighbors to the south and north, and a 10% plunder on China fer their sneaky fentanyl trade! Aye, the high seas o' trade be stormy!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I regale ye with the latest tidings from the landlubber's castle known as the White House. 'Twas a day of great import, for the captain o' the ship, President Trump, be raisin' the Jolly Roger on trade, settin' forth a bounty of tariffs upon our trading mates!Aye, ye heard me right! This weekend, the good Captain be slappin' a hearty 25% tax on the fine folk of Mexico and Canada, while China, that crafty dragon, be lookin' at a 10% duty on their goods. Why, ye ask? Because they’ve been smugglerin' in a no-good potion called fentanyl, causin' ruckus in our ports and scourin' our shipmates with ill effects!
The White House's own parley, the fair Karoline Leavitt, declared this bold move be a retaliation fit for a captain of the high seas. So hoist yer flags, secure yer doubloons, and prepare for the storm, for the trade winds be shifting, and the seas be a-churnin' with these hefty tariffs! Let’s see how the other ships fare ‘gainst this tempest o' tariffs! Arrr!