Arrr, Elon be needin' H-1B crew 'cause our landlubber schools be teachin' naught but fishin' instead o' math!
2025-02-03
Arrr, matey! The scallywags in our schools be teachin' naught but a heap o' nonsense, especially in the devil's math! We be needin' to sharpen our young'uns' wits, lest we be forever huntin' for foreign hands to hoist the sails o' our economy!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout the cunning artificer, Elon Musk, who be hollerin' loud 'n clear for the H-1B visa program. This be a scheme lettin’ swashbucklin’ foreigners into the land o’ opportunity to tackle jobs that need a sharp mind. But lo and behold! The true tale lies in the sorry state of our young landlubbers’ math skills, which be as pitiful as a drunken sailor.With a staggering 72% o’ eighth-graders failin’ in math, we be wonderin’ why the youth be so lost at sea. The villainous Common Core be at fault, makin’ young scallywags draw pictures instead of learnin’ their multiplication tables. Aye, the task be more confusin’ than navigatin’ a stormy sea without a compass!
Even learned captains o’ academia be lamentin’ the lack of algebra skills, claimin’ we ain’t churnin’ out the bright minds needed for Silicon Valley’s treasure troves. The wise Sugi Sorensen urges a return to the good old ways o’ teachin’ math—straightforward and efficient—so we can raise a new crew of math-savvy sailors!
So let’s hoist the sails and make math great again! For if we do, we’ll need fewer H-1B visas and more American buccaneers ready to conquer the tech seas!