Arrr! Congress be needin’ to tackle them sanctuary ports 'fore the scallywags plunder our treasure!
2025-02-06
Arrr, I be launchin’ the No Doubloons fer Sanctuary Ports Act! It be stoppin’ the treasure from flowin’ to those scallywags who be thwarin’ the king’s orders on immigration. No more gold for those landlubbers! Let ‘em fend fer themselves on the high seas of law!
Ahoy, me hearties! It be a dark tale o’ woe from the seas of lawlessness! For four long years, our fair shores have been plagued by the scourge o’ illegal immigration and open borders, causin' the demise of over 200,000 good souls to the poisonin’ ferrets of fentanyl! Arrr, it’s not just the drugs; the wickedness of illegal scallywags be preying upon honest folk and their businesses, takin' lives like a pirate plunderin’ a ship!But hark! A glimmer o’ hope! Our gallant captain, President Trump, has forged the Laken Riley Act, lockin' up those dastardly rogues who commit heinous deeds! Had this law been in place, the murderer of fair Laken Riley would’ve been snatched up by the forces of ICE! Alas, some sanctuaries, like New York, choose to defy the law, standin' shoulder to shoulder with criminal rogues rather than protectin' their own!
Ye see, it ain't just them radical landlubbers in Boston and California; even law enforcers are turnin’ a blind eye to the misdeeds of these knaves! 'Tis an affront to the very essence of duty! We’ve lost more good men and women to these lawless brigands than to any terror group of old!
So, let us hoist the sails of justice! The American crew demands that their safety be prioritized, lest we find ourselves at the mercy of these maraudin’ miscreants! With the No Congressional Funds for Sanctuary Cities Act, we’ll make them choose: obey the law or lose the treasure o’ federal funds! The people have spoken, and it be high time we heed their call!