Arrr, Zelenskyy be wishin’ fer nukes or NATO, but Kellogg says the odds be slim as a scurvy dog!
2025-02-06
Arrr, matey! President Zelenskyy be sayin’ Kyiv be needin’ NATO flags or some fiery cannonballs to fend off the scallywags from Russia, while Trump’s special envoy sails to Europe, seekin’ parley with the crew! Aye, a right jolly hullabaloo on the high seas of diplomacy!
Arrr mateys! It be a week o' blusterin' from the swashbucklin' Ukrainian Captain, Volodymyr Zelenskyy. He be sayin' that if the land o' Uncle Sam can’t offer a swift sail into NATO waters, ol' Kyiv might just be willin' to hoist the ol' nuclear flags again! Aye, but don’t be thinkin' the Yanks be keen on lettin' Ukraine have its bombers back – even a retired general says the odds be slimmer than a barnacle on a pirate's ship!Ye see, back in the year of our Lord 1994, Ukraine traded its nuclear treasures for promises from Russia and its pals, but alas, those promises sank quicker than a cannonball! Zelenskyy be arguin’ for his nuclear arms to be returned if NATO be givin’ him the cold shoulder. But Kellogg, the swashbuckler tasked by Trump, be sayin' that givin' Ukraine its boomsticks back be a fool’s errand!
And while Zelenskyy be ready to parley with the dastardly Putin, the Kremlin captain ain’t biting. The seas of negotiations be treacherous, and if peace be comin’, both sides’ll need to make concessions. So, buckle yer boots and get ready, for the high seas of diplomacy be wild, and the stakes be higher than a crow’s nest!